I first wrote this article in the weeks after October 7, 2023. It is not a history lesson about the conflict between Israel and the terrorist organizations that attack it. It is a lesson in resilience, drawn from a country and a people I know from the inside.
What Happened, and Why Resilience Became the Question
On October 7, 2023, Israel suffered the deadliest terror attack in its history. Around 1,200 people were murdered, most of them civilians, thousands were wounded, and roughly 250 people were taken hostage into Gaza. The weeks that followed reminded many of us of the darkest chapters of human history, and people around the world felt fear, anger, and helplessness.
In the days after the attack, the political divisions that had torn Israeli society apart for the previous year seemed to disappear, and people acted as one. That raised a question I have thought about for most of my life. How does a nation that endured the Holocaust, fought wars for its existence in almost every decade since its founding, and faced repeated waves of terror still function, especially when trauma touches almost every family?
Hardship Does Not Automatically Make People Stronger
The title of this article comes from a familiar saying, and I want to be honest about its limits. Hardship does not automatically make anyone stronger. Some people come out of trauma with lasting injuries, physical and psychological, and they deserve care and patience. What determines the outcome is less the hardship itself and more how people respond to it and what surrounds them while they recover. Resilience is a process, and it depends on actions, relationships, and resources that can be strengthened. That is what makes it worth studying.
What I Have Seen Help Israelis Endure
A Sense That There Is No Alternative
Israelis often speak of a secret weapon, a sentiment frequently attributed to Golda Meir: there is nowhere else to go. There is one Jewish state in the world, and that fact removes the option of giving up. When quitting is not on the table, energy goes into persisting and rebuilding.
Unity in Crisis
Israeli society is known for arguing loudly and for putting differences aside when a threat comes from outside. Resilience is not only personal. It is also communal. A united family, group, or country is stronger than a divided one, because people carry each other’s weight when their own strength runs out.
Hope and Forward Motion
Hope is a large part of that strength. The approach I was raised on is that our best days are just around the corner, so breaking is not an option. Hope in this sense is practical. It is a decision to keep investing in the future while the present is painful.
Keeping Normal Life Going
Until things improve, maintaining routines and focusing on action matters. Even during war and terror, people go to work, send children to school when they can, and keep daily life moving. Routine gives the mind something stable to hold, and action counters the helplessness that trauma creates.
How to Build Resilience in Your Own Life
I am writing a book on resilience, and much of what I have learned comes down to a few practices that anyone can build, long before a crisis arrives.
Know Your Strengths
What are you good at, and what gives you energy? Knowing your strengths tells you where you can contribute when things are hard, and contributing is one of the fastest ways to feel less helpless.
Build and Maintain a Support Network
Friends, family, teammates, and community carry you through difficulty. Being part of a group that accepts you matters, and so does showing up for others. Relationships built in good times are the ones that hold in bad times.
Practice Assertiveness
Resilient people hold on to their principles under pressure. Practicing assertiveness in daily life, saying what you need and holding boundaries, builds the same muscle you will need in a crisis.
Train Your Mind and Body for Stress
Expect the best and prepare for the worst. Controlled exposure to difficulty, whether through physical training, cold mornings, hard conversations, or learning new skills, teaches your nervous system that it can handle stress and recover. This is one reason I believe in training so strongly, and I explore it in Mental Toughness and Before Resilience Comes Pain.
Do Something Meaningful
Purpose gives people strength to face challenges. Volunteering, supporting others, or working toward something that matters beyond yourself turns pain into direction.
Ask for Help When You Need It
Resilience includes knowing when to reach out. Talking with a mental health professional after trauma is a sign of strength and responsibility, and it is often what makes recovery possible.
The Only Way Forward Is Forward
Even in the hardest moments, it is possible to find the strength to cope. When I first wrote this, I was still unsure how anyone could process the atrocities and images we had seen. I still believe what I wrote then: the only way forward is forward, and there will be a way. I wrote more about what those days meant to me personally in Being a Soldier in the IDF in Times of Conflict and, two years later, in October 7th, Two Years Later.
Do something amazing,
Tsahi Shemesh
Founder & CEO
Krav Maga Experts
Relevant Articles:
Awaken the Warrior Within
Why you should not wait for a crisis to build strength.
The Invisible People Who Keep You Going
The support networks that carry us through hard times.
Why Gratitude Is Important During Hard Times
How gratitude supports recovery.
